Meme Girls- Housekeeping On Christmas, December 25th

It’s been a long while since my friend KLB and I have shared our conversational memefest. So we are long overdue to let you in on a hilarious back and forth. Our topic for discussion today was all about housekeeping. So welcome to our chatter that of course ends on a great holiday note. And speaking of winter holidays, for Hanukaah, I actually got her this great journal. And away we go…

“Jenster. Good morning. Thanks for the great gift, however I will never use it because at this age I don’t need an excuse for not cleaning my house even if I rarely leave my house. I’m just flat out not doing it. And the guy from upstairs who sometimes cleans, is visiting family for the next month. So it is what it is. But I have an idea…”

“KLB are you inviting me over?? I’d love to pop by but I actually have so much to do. I need to take advantage of the pagan holiday. In addition to catching up here I have a month’s worth of dust to still Swiffer away since we are now fully unpacked. I love living in the City, until I hate living in the City. What is with all the dust? Seriously.”

“I totally understand. I almost cleaned up the other day, but then I saw the rain hitting the window and got distracted wondering if it was ever going to snow again in NYC. So I took an unexpected deep dive online into global warming and ended up scrapping the whole plan altogether. Sigh.”

“I’m sure if I asked Michael to help out he would. But I don’t wanna do that to him. He has his own house to worry about. I laugh hysterically at those super traditional suburban housewives that trick their hubs into helping them out. Have you seen any of their posts? Check out the genius of this chick…”

“Jen, these women are my idols. But I know you and I share the exact same fantasy…”

“OMG! How did you know? Did you see how smart this woman was? I can’t stop laughing. Possibly a reason to reload the Tinder app? And I even think Michael will approve!”

“That is fabulous. The only thing I can manage to do today so far is to make coffee. And you know how many plants populate my space, right? Well I guess I’ve been neglecting them lately because I got some dirty looks just now.”

“I’m not a plant gal myself. I have fake ones that look real. (PLANTS that is.) However I am spending a bit of time in the kitchen today. My annoying dishwasher is on the fritz again. In addition to the springs popping on the slow release door (for the third time so there’s no way I’m fixing it) it’s not draining properly so I’m stuck here washing a few items. What are you up to today?”

“Wow. Exciting. I have a tough day of dealing with The Chair. Some of the stuff is mine and some is Bill’s and today is the day we decide what gets washed and what gets hung up. Very stressful.”

“Yeesh. Good luck. I got out of bed and looked over my shoulder smiling to see if Michael would make the bed. I don’t know how he does it but his hospital corners are on point and he always fluffs the pillows that I’m too lazy to smack around. So I always make sure to compliment him on his housely duties so that he’ll be happy to help again. He’s the best.”

“He’s a gem. Keep him. I have laundry ready to go downstairs now. Nobody will be using the machines today since it’s a holiday. And I was thinking of all my lost socks over the years…”

“Ha! I think that’s actually true! We are discussing having people over for New Year’s Eve… except this… and you know I hate the thought of glitter everywhere and the inevitable cleanup that must follow.”

“Having people over is a nice thought, and should remain just a thought. You know better. I’m scanning all the websites now for a little house helper that probably goes on sale tomorrow with all the big after Christmas sales…”

“I hear ya. Just don’t let them snack on the job. This happened to me last week…”

“Yeah. Those elves can be so unruly when not properly supervised. Well, have yourself a Merry little Christmas, even though you don’t celebrate. Enjoy the day off! Talk to you soon.”

“Ho. Ho. Ho! You, too. A merry and a happy. xoxo”