Meme Girls- Still Angry, February 27th

The Meme Girls series of posts covers the hilarious banter between me and my friend Kay. We can both be snarky at times and even with little conversation, we often let the memes speak for themselves. This particular series is all about being frustrated, upset and sometimes downright angry. This is actually the second Meme Girls post related to anger. I guess so many people share negative feelings on social media that there are a whole host of hysterical choices from which to select. If you live in NYC and you’ve ever had to deal with alternate side of the street parking rules, I’m sure you can already relate to the first few. I started our Monday sesh by sending her this…

“Good morning, Jenster. I am always amazed by how many people can’t judge the size of their own vehicle so they seriously misunderestimate the fact that they can’t fit into a spot and for the life of them can’t parallel park anyway. I know it was on my driving test. And you couldn’t pass the driving test without successfully parallel parking. And yet…”

“I know. Is it that hard to see that your big ass Chevy truck ain’t getting into that teeny tiny spot between two already banged up compact cars?

“Isn’t it hard to be nice to absolutely everyone? Impossible, right? I hear ya. I’ve seen that meme before. Still makes me laugh though! At least you’ve been cutting down on the cursing. I’m so proud of you. For me, with each passing taxi that doesn’t know how to drive, I can feel my blood pressure rising like the heat on the subway platform in July… not that I would know, but I’ve heard. I even occasionally let the f word slip out every now and again. Oopsie!”

“Yeah. Thanks for noticing that I’ve been trying to cut back. It actually helps not going into an office every day. It was a group effort most places that I’ve worked. Especially banking. Nowadays I let my finger do the talking!”

“I know you’re on that get healthy program. Good for you. I’m supplementing my diet with some takeout Chinese food from Land of Plenty and a lil’ bit of cynicism.”

“My friend Kym has that sign in her office. OMG. Must be popular. I know that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. But dang! It does help when you’re just fit to be tied. Where do you think all this stress comes from? I’m guessing our childhoods? Our parents told us some crazy tall tales.”

“Suburban legends obviously. Remember this one? I’m still terrified to put that light on!”

“Same here. Thank goodness we’ve wised up, right? We aren’t such delicate flowers anymore either. We are street smart from living in the City for so long. We look like we live here. We belong. We have that walk fast don’t ask me questions cool exterior. We aren’t falling for some scam from some con man.”

“Ha! I love eclairs! Have you been to that amazing place on the East Side in the 50s? What am I even talking about. Aren’t you the one who told me about it? Yep, I think you are. I could go for one right now. Ugh. Clearly I have no control.”

“We used to call them poppies. I freaking loved popping those suckers. One by one. Or stepping on a whole bunch at a time. Why was that sound so soothing? And the repetition never even bothered me. Ah to be young again. Getting older just sucks.”

“Honestly that sounds like a kick ass weekend to me! I know so many people who have trouble keeping their tempers in check. One of my neighbors downstairs has completely lost his mind. We chat sometimes in the laundry room after midnight. The guy is mad at the world. He keeps a notebook with him of all the people who have wronged him. And Jen, he fills it in every single day. That’s commitment for ya!”

“Ummmm. Please bring Bill with you to the laundry room from now on, eh? That guy sounds a little too scary. One of my neighbors is always taking her kids to the play room in our building or should I say attempting to herd those cats through the door before they take off and run laps around the front desk or dart into the mail room screaming. This poor Mom looks like she’s about to lose it every time I see her.”

“Not having kids really isn’t so bad for me. I hate the screaming kid on a plane thing and the acting out in restaurants thing and the running around an otherwise adult location thing. Some parents are so oblivious that their kids are behaving badly. So I try to help them out with a little third-party reality check.”

“Yikes, Kay. A tiny bit harsh, dontcha think?? Why not go all natural and try an herbal remedy? Essential oils perhaps?”

“Jeez! That one is priceless. I think sometimes those disobedient kids grow up to be rude adults. I saw this sign for folks just like them outside of the deli on Columbus Avenue.”

“That was a brilliant idea! Gotta love the ingenuity of NYC shop owners. For the rest of us, I think we could all use a nap. Ooooh, maybe even a siesta and this…”

“It’s so important to find viable forms of stress relief. Living here can really get the better of you. I also think we need to find fun ways to amuse ourselves. For instance, I strongly suggest this if it applies…”

“That is a riot! We have to put up with so much shit, it’s nice to get the upper hand once in a while. And speaking of…”

“Sometimes I find it oh so difficult to be proud of our American heritage. Well it’s been lovely memming with you this morning. Time to start my day and you are busy I imagine. It is Monday after all. Have a great day!”