Meme Girls- Corporate Culture, March 28th

If you’re just tuning in, Meme Girls is a blog series based on a conversation I have regularly with my good friend KLB. Instead of using mostly words to text each other, we correspond through memes. And she is the queen of all topics. Recently she picked work as an easy target. She started by sending me this gem…

“KLB! How are you?! Since you’ve retired I bet you can’t even remember the frustrations you felt working with the weakest links when you were such a corporate superstar! I once heard someone whisper about a co-worker, ‘She’s impossible to underestimate!’ Wow– that was so true. I actually love the word misunderestimate. Cracks me up every time I use it. I found this mug that translates the current culture you might be missing around the water cooler…”

“Jenster! Kind regards! Thanks for the ugly mug! Even though I’ve retired I remember the working world all too well. Remember Betsy from business banking? You worked with her a few years ago? This reminds me of her…”

“I know! She was such a talker and sticking her nose into everyone’s bee’s wax. She hated all my cute outfits and funky shoes too. (How could she?!) So glad I’m no longer with that firm. Remember when I finally left that job? Ah the relief! I should have gifted her my special hot chocolate mug.”

“Ha! I love that one! You should have sent all your bosses this… but then arrest and prison might have followed. Thrilled you were able to escape after all the drama. But Pooh and Piglet had your back.”

“Aren’t you so glad that you get to work from home now, Jen? I know you travel a bunch but have you thought about doing this for your Monday all hands call? I’m always lookin’ out for ya, kiddo.”

“OMG. That is a genius hack! The pandemic has certainly brought out the best and most creative ideas in some of us. One of my last companies was so conservative. I should have posted this graphic on all of the bathrooms. It’s actually so nice not to share a restroom with disrespectful and dirty colleagues! And I don’t miss those signs posted in the stalls that reminded everyone to flush. Really? Ya need a reminder? Gross!”

“Nice warrior. I know you always work for inclusive companies but who is currently hiring two headed workers and aliens? Maybe inclusion has gone a bit too far this time. I know what will make you happy!!”

“Hey, baby. You’ve certainly got my numbah! Why do companies not promote yoga pants at work? They are dreamy. Lulu could have punch cards for everyone and when you buy 10 pair you earn some sort of corporate coupon. There are things I do miss about working in a regular office though. Sitting in friends’ cubes and having morning chats. Yummy daily business lunches that the company sponsored. Daydreaming in pipeline meetings! And free cake for every single holiday and birthday. Those were the days…”

“I’m seriously surprised that more people don’t go postal. Working at work is so stressful. How are you supposed to take an afternoon nap with all those people making noise down the hall? They should have rest hour like we did in sleepaway camp. And maybe hand out journals to minimize dissatisfaction and violence? I’m sure these would be super popular!”

“Those are a great Christmas gifts. I’ll certainly keep them in mind. I can’t text now. I have a ton of follow up to do from my last conference. Talk soon. xoxo”

“You’re not a carrot. Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re more like… like a mango! A little odd but super sweet if handled properly. Have you thought about changing jobs? What about self-employment?

“KLB! I am a business gal. What’s doing right is worth doing for money, silly! The only thing about my current job that bothers me is all the logins. I can’t remember all the passwords to access all the systems and then when I do get it right, they ping my phone for double secret authentication.”