Imagine loitering around baggage claim with a crowd of hundreds who all just deplaned a packed international flight. You can barely stand straight because you’re still half scrunched from the cramped seating in economy plus. Your brood is starving due to the limited menu items on board, and you’re all exhausted from the days-long line at customs. You’re wearing your heavy winter coats, the jet lag is already kicking in, and you’re desperate to finally be home.
And as you’re waiting there, arms folded across your chest praying that your luggage also made the harrowing journey in one piece, a pile of collective belongings pooled in a circle at your feet, your heart skips a beat as you see the conveyor belt churn to life and spit out three or four odd looking bags and then grind to an abrupt halt. Consequently those three bags go around and around on the carousel and not a single soul reaches out to claim them. Where are these imaginary passengers whose bags scrambled out of flight 7265? Weren’t they the ones to exit the plane first?? Wouldn’t it be just wonderful if we were all able to quickly identify our own baggage? It’s time to own up, people.
When I was on the dating apps, I used to joke that I was looking for a guy whose personal baggage fit in the overhead compartment and not someone who needed to check heavy luggage because he had so many issues. I eventually found my dream man (only took me 52 years of looking!) and thank goodness Michael’s issues are entirely manageable– by him of course. Because we all know that we can only change ourselves, not somebody else. (If that comes as news to you, please DM me for Dr. Lauren’s number. You’re going to just love her.)
But what do you do when someone close to you demands that you radically change your behavior to suit their needs? How do you react? Are you courageous enough to re-examine yourself in case he might be right? This happened to me recently during a very heated and emotional argument. I am a strong, outspoken person who is often unafraid of confrontation. (Hello, have we met??) So I don’t see how holding others accountable for their actions makes me a bad person. I am always willing and able to accept the consequences of my behavior. But apparently, my directness sometimes offends otherwise gentle souls.
So I took a closer look. And I had a think. And you know what? Sometimes I should be a little more careful with my words. I can pay more attention to those closest to me and not take those relationships for granted. I seem to be on my best behavior with strangers and while facing inward, I see that I can tone it down a bit and soften my delivery with my loved ones and be more patient. So this is me, with the odd sized bag, not realizing that it’s been spinning on the carousel right in front of my face, and it’s mine to claim.
jenslittleblackbook.com 